Self-care. It’s important, we all know that and we still don’t prioritize it. Everyone needs self-care. When people think of self-care they immediately think it will take up too much of their time that they already don’t have. There are so many things people don’t realize are actually self-care! I’ll be the first to admit that I let my self-care slip when I become stressed with life. Adulting is hard and becomes stressful in a split second. You feel overwhelmed, like you’re drowning in a tidal wave of family obligations, work, friends, bills, trying to manage a social life, and if you have little ones trying your best to keep them happy and alive. Not to mention their games, recitals, practices, doctors appointments, play dates, and so many other things that have to happen just this week. You’re looking at your calendar trying to figure out how you’re even going to have time to eat and sleep with everything you have to do. Well let’s be honest with ourselves. Everyone is stressed. Even that one person in your life who looks like they have everything together all the time. I’ve actually had people ask me “Courtney you’re never stressed out what’s your secret?” Y’all my secret is that I am stressed! I just find small ways everyday to take care of myself. The best way I can explain this is when you’re on an airplane they always tell you to put your oxygen mask on first and then help your child or others who are struggling. That’s basically what I do. I have to take care of my needs before I can cater to others. Think about the oxygen as your food, your sleep, your outlet, whatever you choose to do for self care. So here are some ways you can have a little self-care whenever you need it.
EAT! Breakfast, lunch, dinner, and small snacks throughout the day! When you’re hangry you’re feelings of stress increases because now not only are you stressed you’re now hungry! Stressed, hungry people are more likely to become angry over the smallest things. So find time in your busy schedule to eat, even if it’s just a snack.
This next one is mainly for those of you who have a lot of anxiety. Consider cutting out caffeine. Okay not completely all at once because you will go through withdrawals and potentially get headaches. I mean start drinking one less cup of coffee a day, or stop drinking caffeine after 2 pm. If you completely cut out caffeine good for you! That’s absolutely amazing, but I know that’s not going to work for everyone. Caffeine increases heart rate making people feel more anxious. A little (healthy amount) anxiety keeps humans functioning. Caffeine also dehydrates people. Dehydration causes people to feel sluggish. Replacing a caffeinated beverage with water not only will rehydrate you but your body will thank you! If you wake up in the morning and still feel exhausted drink some water and rehydrate before you have your cup of coffee. By cutting back on caffeine you may feel sluggish at first but after a few days you will feel better, feel less anxious, and sleep better in the long run (more energy, yay!). Which brings me to my next tip.
Sleep. It is so important for humans to get enough sleep at night! Everyone is different when it comes to sleep some people need less sleep others need more! If you have teens you will notice they sleep until noon on the weekends it’s not because they are super lazy, but they actually NEED more sleep! Making sure you are able to get enough sleep will help you in so many areas of your life!! Let’s be real, when we stop sleeping as much as we should we sometimes get sick. I think this is the universe (and my body) telling me that I need to slow down and get some quality rest. Not the catnaps that college students take so they can pull an all nighter to finish their assignment that’s due at 8 am. I mean getting a few nights of good sleep. No, deadlines do not go away when you’re sick but you will be more productive at work when you get enough sleep.
Breathe. Everyone needs to take a deep breath...like right now and when I say deep breath I mean one that goes down to your diaphragm and makes you look like you had a big lunch kind of deep breath. Not a shallow breath where only your chest expands those help some but deep breaths are so much better (be careful after doing a lot of deep breaths like that though because you may feel light headed when you stand up). Deep breathing helps to get oxygen to your brain so you can think more clearly which not only makes you feel better but helps you meet your deadlines and work and due dates at school!
Okay. This next one is really difficult for me. Exercise. Now I’m not saying to go out and get a gym membership and exercise 1 hour a day 5 times a week (if you want to go for it)! A lot of people don’t think they have time to exercise due to their busy schedules. Many people have desk jobs and literally feel like they sit all day. Some tricks I have to getting up and moving are parking farther away at the grocery store so I have to walk a little farther to go into the store, I will stand up to do paperwork, and I will walk places when I can. When I worked as a school based mental health counselor, the school was set up more like a college campus than a typical school so I would walk to each of the school buildings on campus to see my clients. I also take the stairs instead of the elevator (usually 3-4 floors is my max), for this one use good judgment don’t wear yourself out taking the stairs if you work on the highest floor of the tallest building in your city. Overall exercise helps to give you energy and it is also the best antidepressant out there so get up and get moving any little bit that you can!
If you have a little more time on your hands for self-care do something creative, something that you love but rarely have time to do, or learn a new skill!
If you know me at all you know I’m an artist. I’m super crafty and love teaching myself new skills. A while ago I was under a lot of stress. I had just started a new job, I had some changes in my personal life and found myself with a lot of free time on the weekends. What did I do with this free time? I taught myself how to make quilts. Yes, something that is becoming a lost art. I at 25 taught myself how to make quilts. I didn’t even know how to use a sewing machine at the time I didn’t know how to hand quilt or machine quilt or anything honestly. So I, in the name of self-care, taught myself how to quilt. My first one wasn’t great, but I was proud of it and I kept going! I was starting to feel like myself again, not the person I was before I made the quilt but a stronger version of that person.
So, find your quilting, something that you enjoy doing that you usually don’t have time for. Like reading, coloring, painting, talking to someone you love, going to dinner with friends (we all have to eat after all), hiking, playing a sport you haven’t played in a while, having a date night, whatever you think will work for you! If you feel like you need to make time for it, MAKE TIME FOR IT! You will feel more refreshed and will be able to cater to other things in your life more effectively and efficiently. Remember you have to put on your oxygen mask before you can help someone else.